Artist Statement

These photographs are a story to you and memories to me. They represent the darkest moments, the most incredible stories, the bravest of faces and that unquenchable thirst for life and everything in between.  

The intention throughout the semester remained unchanged, I wanted to portray the past twelve months in a series of photographs that could stand by themselves when taken away from the series.

The concept revolves around losing the very fundamental nature of who you are, going through the motions of dealing with that loss of purpose or intention and then eventually finding balance between the extremes.

As it’s a personal story I had a clear map of how these images would take shape and what they’d say to each viewer. The images aren’t obvious and typical with my ideas written on them; they act as my mental snapshots but are completely open to interpretation by another.

In hindsight I wouldn’t do anything differently, they are a collection of photographs, some staged and some completely vulnerable but all helping to display the loss of identity and recovery of soul. 

Concept Image Seven

This photo was supposed to be the easiest to take since i spend every waking/sleeping moment with them but after almost a semester later it's done. 
I've never felt faces have been necessary when it comes to trying to portray something in a photograph, they lessen the chance others have to relate. 
This photo wasn't planned, we'd all just been swimming and they sat up on the ledge and i knew if i didn't grab it they'd move and i'd miss my chance.
It embodies who they are to me, they're kids who still do stupid things but are fiercely loyal. 
I just love the great expanse that lies before them and the big fluffy white clouds so soft you could sleep easy on them. I printed this photo twice, once on vellum and the other on water paper. I placed the vellum on top of the water paper and it just gives it this beautiful clarity but also a rich texture that you can almost touch.

OH MY GOSH I LOVE PAPER.

It only dawned on me the other day, "Paper? What? Since when?" I then proceeded to run all over town to find the coolest and/or raddest paper i could possibly print on. I found this little store tucked away in Civic. I bought Vellum, Italian Water Paper (that's what the label said! Racists.) and Crinkly Water paper, the kind that always looks like it's moving with the most amazing texture. I flew home, raced towards dad's Canon inkjet printer that does not get the work out it should, and proceeded to learn all about what you should and shouldn't put through your dad's printer. I tried the Vellum first and was pleasantly surprised when 70% of the photographs came out relatively normal. For some strange reason the black did not want to co-operate with me at all so some of those tones don't sit quite right. The moving water paper went next and the texture played with the nozzles some so i ended up with a few baby black flicks on edges of the borders. You can practically touch my blue dress the texture is so fantastic. The Italian paper went next and i almost cried it was so perfect. I just love paper. I chose to print out the distance photograph with the boy walking away. It made the photo almost dream like with soft grass enveloping this bold figure in the middle. 


I then considered how i was going to put all these photos together, box or binding? The great dilemma! I went digging through every store in Canberra that even slightly mentioned second hand and came up with nothing. Some things were too loved and trashed, others too plastic and casually discarded. My last option was Revolve on Mugga Mugga Lane. That place is a graveyard for old bikes without chains, bed heads that don't even squeak any more, books with dog-eared pages, tools that have lost their new shine and random objects practically electrified with vague memories of the past. You know when you're walking through a supermarket and you know you're looking for something in particular but until you see it you have no idea? That's exactly how i felt when i found a much loved violin case. I suppose this makes complete sense to me, this case carried around an instrument that someone held passion for, whether it was love or hate is beside the point. These memories to me are items i can touch and hold much passion for. They were turning points,  sad realisations, moments of immense love and exquisite pain. That's what life is, a collection of moments. I started stacking all these things that reminded me of these different times into the case and came to the conclusion it was a mess and was neither non linear or linear, it was a slew of paper, vellum and dead rosebuds. I created individual piles for the photographs and then bound them like little parcels with brown string. They're touchable memories that other people can make sense of instead of just me. 
I'm sorry this is so long but it feels like a really long time since i've had a solid idea worth talking about, this is what getting back on the wagon looks like.

Box over Book Binding?

i love the smell of a book, no matter what kind of book, there's a whole other world within the pages and it's just fantastic. I've made a mock book with the first six images but i just dont feel like it's right for what i'm trying to achieve. 
Something else i love almost as much as books are things, little trinkets, receipts, ribbons, scraps of paper with useless scribbles, shells and rocks from the beach. Things that carry memory weight to me because to another these things are clutter and junk. 
As these photos are all memories i feel these little things are almost too much to just skip over, they're belong with the memories like two halves of anything belong to each other. 
The next idea I'm going to try is printing the photos on pieces of cloth and arranging them between the scraps of things in a completely non linear way in a largish rectangular box. i've moved forward from the linear perspective as it really only applies to how i view them, to another set of eyes they're just photographs in a box or book. They need to be able to stand alone because if they're being viewed in a non linear fashion, one can't rest on the success of the other. 
i had a complete stranger the other day, after talking to me for ten minutes, call me a loveist. Not a romantic, a loveist. Someone who seems to love more than hate and someone who says beautiful more than ugly. 
These photographs are the memoirs of a loveist.

Concept Image 6

My dear we're slow dancing in a burning room.


i had so much help with this photo it feels like a group effort. I had people to carry the furniture, then move the furniture around till it was perfect, douse everything with fuel and light the match. Then of course i had two beautiful people look at me strange when i could see nothing particularly abnormal about the situation i was about to place them in. Pretty average Saturday night. 
I couldn't have asked for better weather conditions or a more perfect setting that night, not a whisper of wind, just white hot flames engulfing my unwanted but loved dearly Revolve furniture.
I suppose i had a bit of a leg up on this image as i was drawing on inspiration that i had already fallen crazy in love with, i just made it my own and made it very literal. 
i love this shot, it's exactly what i was aiming for but i think it's even better than i thought could work out. You know how sometimes a frame can sum up better than words, how you felt in a single moment? This is that moment.

Concept Photograph 6

All we know is distance. 

I love it when people figure out exactly what they want to do with the rest of their lives, especially when you still have a part in that life but when it feels like endless goodbyes it's really hard to keep the stiff upper lip. 
My bestfriend decided to join the Navy and hang out on ships for months at a time and at this point, it seems all we know are departure lounges, last looks and that pang we get when someone walks by that reminds us of each other. 


I'd like this photo to be a close crop of a female face buried in a male shoulder with a look of goodbye written all over it. I'll employ the use of soft morning light so the shadows are barely there and a shallow depth of field. 

Concept photograph 5

Now angel, where did you leave your wings?

I don't know what to say about my wings. I know i need to have a set of them in the series but where to place them is the mystery. 

i love the thought of freedom and everything it implies but then again, once you reach freedom, who's there to see you? Is it lonely?

Maybe they just act as my option, i don't have to be stuck somewhere, i always have the chance to leave and fly else where. I think i'll take that tact as i construct this image. I'm considering, if i get my hands on lovely feathers, I'll do something with them that way. A portrait of someone covered in feathers would be pretty rad. 

Concept 4

Photograph nine is going to prove  rather exciting as i plan to have fire and smouldering piles of old rotting furniture in the frame as well as two beautifully dressed individuals. Possibly an old bus too.

The inspiration behind this scene comes from a John Mayer song named Slow dancing in a burning room. It's about the last dance a couple share before ending it, before everything becomes a pile of burnt passionless love. I can imagine this song with a single frame, a couple standing in the middle of a room, waltz position, with a chandelier, flames licking the walls and the record player completely engulfed.
I'd love to do this but have no rooms I can burn down so we've been collaborating on what I can burn which would still carry the effect. 
The list is; 

• A really old bus which the boys would gut for me and take all the flammable stuff out.
• Items of furniture bought from Revolve made into a room minus the walls but all still alight.
• A circular patch of long grass surrounded by dirt to simulate walls on fire
• Piles of already burnt stuff scattered around a piece of land, couch, tele, record player etc 

I'm excited for this shoot, it'll be a challenge but if i can pull it off, it might just be awesome.

Artist Book Idea

Just made a quick discovery in class whilst looking for artist books.

Nina Judin designs and makes artist books, they are way beautiful. 

This is what i'm leaning towards at this early early point in time;

A View from an Apartment - Jeff Wall

What do our lives look like to a complete stranger? Our homes? Do they notice how we arrange our knickknack's or our most treasured possessions on the mantel? 
Jeff Wall's approach to these questions is pretty wild, it looks like a real apartment and feels like a real family setting. It's so inviting to just look around, take everything in without feeling like you're intruding on these people's lives. He gives the viewer all the necessary tools to get to know the people, how they live, what their habits are like, if they fold their washing or have their feet on the seat. 


We don't usually get free rein to just check out a house, someone's home, but this series proves how curious we are, how desperate we are to know how others live. Wall has a few other series' that are similar to A View from an Apartment but they have more depth and narrative to them. 
A View from an Apartment tells a story without even trying, it just exists for curious eyes who thirst to know what the people are like on the other side of the glass.

Concept Photograph 3

These are all the words i never had a chance to say. Unless you write something down it doesn't really exist yet, it's purely a thought or silent wish in your head. 
The immediate focus in this photograph is on the bow holding everything together, similar to how my top and bottom lip did that for me. I felt that a shallow depth of field would give it a beautiful soft feeling around the edges, cut away the sharpness of the envelopes and emphasize the soft curls of the bow. These letters are sitting on an old chair that is so worn nobody has the heart to sit on it just in case. I'm unsure of the mark bottom right of the image, i don't think it detracts but it might to another set of eyes.
There will be no text in the series I've decided, it's too hard trying to balance words and image and not have them clash and cancel each other out.

Concept Photograph 2

This is my first attempt at image one, Blogger doesn't do the colour justice unfortunately. 
I believe people who say they're fine after a tragedy like heartbreak are constantly looking for a way out of the mass hurt they're enduring, they're on the brink of leaving but they have no escape plan, just a packed suitcase full of happier times. 
In this frame I wanted to employ a really shallow depth of field to grab the beautiful bokeh and a bright colour to offset the brown suitcase. As a first try at this part of the concept I'm pretty happy with the result but there are a few more things i need to try before settling on it.

Concept Photograph 1

In one of my story boards i've jotted down the use of a steering wheel and hands as they represent so much more than just that. These hands belong to a mechanic friend of mine who, with a group of close mates , undoubtedly saved me from walking straight off a cliff looking for respite from pain induced by another. We were driving down to the coast one short summer day and i remember looking over and seeing how marked and blackened his hands were from all the grease and oil the day before. It was then i realised that in life no one is going to get out without being a little scratched and bruised, it's how we deal with those little hiccups along the way that matter.
 I understand this image doesn't do the concept justice but it is a simple start to this very rad process.  

First Folio Thoughts.

Story : 

1. An account of imaginary or real people and events told for entertainment: "an adventure story"

My story is one of endless goodbyes, intoxicating hope, silly love letters, red umbrellas, a constant exploration of what home means to me, welcome back embraces, and those people who i base my existentance around. 

After reading what David Campbell had to say about linear and non-linear stories and how we need to ask ourselves "what story do we want to tell?", I'm heading towards a linear story of the past 12 months. 

Starting with the loss of identity and finishing with recovery of soul. 

Picture one - Bent knees picking up old tattered suitcases 

Picture two - Stack of letters on a chair, "after i send these i hope i'll be more than okay" 

Picture three - Crack of light under a dark room doorway

Picture four - Road trip, hands on the steering wheel

Picture five - Portrait of the three boys. 

Picture six - All we know is distance

Picture seven - A pair of wings 

Picture eight - Slow dancing in a burning room? 

Picture nine -  Welcome home embrace

Picture ten - Red umbrella in amongst farm land


Purely rough thinking, stick around for refined ideas.